I have to admit, I have enjoyed this summer, not being pregnant. I don't have to worry about overexerting myself or feeling bad about eating junk food sometimes. I also am able to enjoy an ice cold beer when I want too, especially delicious at our cookouts during football games.
I'm also a lot less worried about my weight when I'm not thinking about getting pregnant again. I'm finally shedding pounds consistently and I'm loving the results. I still have another 10-15lbs to get back to my pre-baby weight. It has been slow going, but it is happening.
I know being pregnant isn't all that bad, but it means being a lot more conscious about everything you do. And I remember being really tired. I also worry about weighing more than I did the first time.
In theory, I shouldn't gain as much weight, but I don't want it to affect our new baby either, or make me a whale in a year. I've been working on the weight department all summer and I have lost a good 10lbs is you can believe it. I had a really hard time loosing weight right after Zoey was born. Then again, I would rather I have a few extra pounds and Zoey (and our next baby) be healthy and strong. So I feel like I'm doing alright where it really matters.
I'm also not looking forward to being pregnant and keeping up with Zoey. I can picture Zoey with a newborn in tow, but I can't quite imagine her being very happy about me not being able to move much those last few months.
Though, I realize women have been doing this for centuries and have no problem with multiple children. And all of the other stuff...of course it's worth it. When those new baby eyes look up at you, it's always worth it.
It doesn't help that I have several friends about to give birth. In fact, my cousin just had her son today. It doesn't help with the increasing baby fever.
To have more kids or to not, that is the question. But it's not really a question at all I suppose. Of course, I want more kids. Stephen and I knew when we married that we wanted multiple children and that hasn't changed.
That does bring a whole other side of the thought to more kids. In our eyes, Zoey has been the best kid ever, she is smart, mild mannered, and all around awesome. What if the next kid isn't? Will we still be able to love him or her as much? I know the answer is yes, but these are the things I think about.
Well, I definitely want more kids, even with all of the questioning. All the sacrifices are beyond worth it and we will love him or her with everything we are, just like we love Zoey.
However, I've also learned so things along this journey we call life. I know this time around to appreciate life now. I know to enjoy who I am, who my family is right now. I know to be patient and to not let the baby fever get to me. I know that God has a wonderful plan for my life and for my family, I just have to wait on His blessing and His timing. So I am.
When the time comes, the sacrifices will be made and I will be excited. Until then I am going to enjoy the little things in life and be excited.
|Zoey just after birth. Look at those eyes, oh yes, completely worth it!|